Thursday, January 6, 2011

Oh yeah Season 3 Yeah!!!

So it is almost that time.  Time for America to huddle around the tv at 10 o'clock EST and laugh at the train wreck that is Jersey Shore.  I won't lie, when I saw previews of season 1 I was a little turned off.  I thought it was, well pretty much what it is, a bunch of wop degos thinking they're hot shit getting all hammered on camera.  I mean if The Sitch and Pauly D weren't on the show it would be the dumbest thing that has ever graced the air waves.  Those two just make the show by acting the way you are not supposed to act when starring in a reality show.  Everything they do is strictly for the cameras which is brilliant.  You gotta love when they have a bunch of skanks ready to jump in jacuzzi and one of the skanks opens their mouth and says something that is displeasing to the Sitch.  He just pauses, looks at the camera, and proceeds to order the skank a cab.  I don't know if it's because these skanks know they're on tv or if they really just have zero self respect for themselves.  Any girl outside of the Jersey Shore world would be like, "Fuck you, dickhead.  I don't want to jump in your jacuzzi cuz you're a greasy, garlic knot making mother fucker and that tub probably has every kind of STD swimming around in it.". 

On to the females of the show.  Snooki.  Oh Snooki.  I would plow the shit out of Snooki.  Not because she is attractive, because we all know that isn't true, but because she is about 4'8 with Q size tits.  I mean I don't think I have ever really seen a midget with that large of a chest.  I would titty bang her so hard her family back in Italy would feel it.  Then you got JWoww.  This bitch is bound for an insane asylum.  Yeah ok, after she cakes her face with make up and lets those fake ass titties hang out, she's not too bad.  But when you get her going first thing in the morning, she can give us normal people nightmares.  I just want to see those bare tits once to see if I would suck on those pepperonis she's probably rocking underneath those half shirts she wears. 

Apparently there is a new chick on the show this season.  From watching the commercials, she likes to drink as much as Snooki and loves knocking bitches like JWoww.  Pretty much, she's ex-wife material.  She is a midget that is swinging at anyone who looks at her the wrong way or calls her fake (Degos apparently don't like being called fake).  Either way, she will probably contribute to the show better than that Angelina cunt who thought she was hot and stuck around after being told on a daily basis no one liked her and she was fucking disgusting. 

For anyone who has a problem with Jersey Shore then you must have a problem with yourself.  This is entertainment at it's finest seeing that these clowns do things that no one decent human being would do.  Pretty much, rather than us looking stupidly drunk and dancing like a morons, we can tune into MTV on Thursday nights at 10 EST and live vicariously through these wop degos. 

1 comment:

  1. TunaCan, you suck balls. Stop posting links on Barstool you dick loving cock gobbler.